Happy Tuesday again. We have lots to cover.
By this time in your fantasy season, you’re starting to find out who is the real and who is the jabroni. With injuries piling up across the league and plenty of (fantasy) football to be played, it’s never too premature to take a good look at your roster to see where you stand. Maybe you’re 0-3 and it’s time to sell your first rounder for some depth. Maybe you’re 3-0, looking for an early upgrade that locks you in as a playoff team. Wherever you are in your journey, I bid you fair winds and following seas.
TRAVIS KELCE TD. TAYLOR SWIFT GOES CRAZY. pic.twitter.com/AZNDXoHBQt
— Barstool Sports (@barstoolsports) September 24, 2023
Taylor Swift went to Arrowhead yesterday to watch her “friend” Travis Kelce play football. She sat in the family suite next to Travis’ mom and yelled obscenities in her ear when he scored (rude!). They left in a convertible together which was some goofy shit out of an 80’s romcom. This all feels like a weird social experiment and I can’t wait to witness armageddon when their relationship inevitably deathqueefs and ceases to exist.
Moving on.
The action kicked off last Thursday night when the Giants traveled to San Fran to receive a lively fisting as the 49ers had their way with them. This primetime game may as well have been called Turdsday Night Football because the Giants got real fecal with it.
49ers 30, Giants 12.
The game can more or less be summarized in this four second clip:
Daniel Jones looking at the 49ers defense has me cryin
#NYGvsSF pic.twitter.com/kw9nhWiCu8
— Tony Clements (@TonyCMKE) September 22, 2023
After a skeet-worthy week 2 that instilled false confidence in Giants fans, this week’s edition of Daniel Jones looked petrified and completed 22 of 32 passes for a measly 137 yards and a pick. He only ran it twice for 5 yards, truly harpooning any chance he had of producing fantasy points. Those are QB27 numbers and his dichotomous season continues. Even with a QB1 week 2 sandwiched in there, he’s currently QB19 overall on the season. In simpler terms, he was sickeningly bad in weeks 1 and 3. If he can’t be “Dimebag Daniel” more often than “Dogshit Daniel”, then the Giants might want a refund on that $160 million investment. He’s the furthest thing from a trustworthy fantasy option but there is always that potential in there to string you along.
If you’re down bad enough to start Matt Breida in Saquon Barkley’s absence, congratulations – he scored a TD. The only Giants TD of the week! He carried 4 times for 17 yards. Don’t worry, it wasn’t any better for Gary Brightwell who had 4 carries for 5 yards.
As for fantasy highlights for Giants receivers, there aren’t many to report. Darius Slayton led the way with 3 catches for 32 yards (YUCK). It only gets worse from there. Darren Waller was only able to haul in 3 catches for 20 yards. This, from a preseason top-5 tight end, is sadness for fantasy owners everywhere. The Giants stink, divest in the Giants.
The 49ers, however, do not stink. Brock Purdy put a less-than-stellar week 2 behind him and went 25/37 for 310 yards and 2 TD passes (Week 3 QB12). Much better from him and that was even without the services of Brandon Aiyuk at his disposal.
Christian McCaffrey: still a hot dude, still good. 18 for 85 yards and another TD. 5 catches for 34 yards as well. The game was handled so easily that even Elijah Mitchell got 11 carries for 42 yards. It was a stress-free RB5 week for CMC and he’s living up to his lofty ADP. He saw his snap count go down to 63% after playing 100% of the offensive snaps in week 2, and that’s a good thing. He was at an unsustainable pace, second in the league in carries and leading most stat categories, but this just goes to show he can still produce on an elite level without having to be overused – especially in games that they win by 3 possessions.
George Kittle finally got going with 7 catches for 90 yards and it was nice to see him active in the offense. Again, Aiyuk’s injury probably opened the door a bit for Kittle and he took full advantage of the vacated targets. Deebo Samuel did the same with 6 catches for 129 yards and a TD, his second consecutive week with a score. The 49ers offense is a powderkeg, invest in the 49ers.
Up in sunny Detroit, The Lions stifled the Falcons running attack and Aidan Hutchinson stanky leg’d all over their bloody corpses with his first two sacks of the season and one very lame celebration.
Aidan Hutchinson hit the stanky leg
pic.twitter.com/Te0sJT8Zen
— FOX Sports: NFL (@NFLonFOX) September 24, 2023
Lions 20, Falcons 6.
It wasn’t pretty for the Falcons with just two field goals to speak of on the day, due in large part to the Lions defense. Desmond Ridder was forced to throw 38 passes, which is never a good sign for a run-first offense. He was 21/38 for 201 yards.
The dueling RBs of Atlanta were locked down from the start and there wasn’t much success on the ground for the Falcons. Bijan Robinson set the pace with 10 carries for 33 yard and Tyler Allgeier added 7 for 12 (FUCKEN YUCK). Bijan had 4 catches for 27 yards and Allgeier had 2 for 17, but otherwise these two were wrapped up and FedEx’d back to Atlanta. The Lions completely shut down the run and resorting to Ridder in the passing game isn’t where the Falcons are at their best, so chalk this one up as a fail and move along. The RB distribution is still worth monitoring if you’re a Robinson or Allgeier owner. The final touch count was again in favor of Robinson, 14 to 9, but it’s worth noting that Allgeier only played in 30% of the snaps with the run game being abandoned. 
The statistical leader of the offense was Kyle Pitts! This is huge for Pitts owners and Ridder seems to really be forming a solid bond there. OOPS! He only caught 5 passes for 41 yards in a game where they were forced into throwing a bunch of passes. Still overrated, still droppable.
Jonnu Smith also had 5 catches for 37 yards, so if you’re picking up an Atlanta tight end he’d be the one to get. Drake London with just 2 catches for 31 yards. The Falcons live and breathe by the run, and if that fails so does their offense as a whole.
The Lions rode their defense into the sunset on Sunday and all Jared Goff had to do was keep it between the ditches. He was 22/33 for 243, 1 TD, and 1 INT. Goff isn’t a fantasy superstar, but he’s an elite game manager that won’t hurt you if you’re in a pinch, currently QB10 amidst some bad quarterback play to start this NFL season.
With David Montgomery still out, Jahmyr Gibbs handled 17 carries and converted for 80 yards. There wasn’t much of a threat from Craig Reynolds who only got 4 carries for 15 yards. As long as Montgomery is out, Gibbs is your guy and I think he busts out against the Packers who are allowing 136.7 rushing yards per game so far.
Amon-Ra St. Brown once again had 9 catches for 102 yards, he’s as solid as they come.
The big breakout for the Lions offense was rookie Sam LaPorta who caught 8 passes for 84 yards and a TD. He’s been on the field for roughly 80% of the Lions’ snaps and he got 11 targets on Sunday. Tight end is a tough spot this season outside of Kelce and Hockenson, so if LaPorta is somehow still available in your league go ahead and win that waiver bid.
In spite of himself, Brandon Staley lives to see another day as the Chargers squeak by the Vikings in a close one.
Chargers 28, Vikings 24.
Rant alert: Big numbers for Justin Herbert, nice fantasy game, but he still doesn’t have that killer instinct. Prove me wrong. They should’ve absolutely lost this football game, and what an epic loss it would’ve been. All I ever hear about is how good he is and how talented and young and blah blah blah. He’s the third highest paid QB in the league and he’s 25-24 on his career. Even more problematic, 0-1 in the playoffs. He really hasn’t earned that colossal contract but that’s how the NFL operates, so whatever. I have no doubt on his skillset, but do something other than pad your regular season stats one time. Go to the playoffs and stop submitting to the loser culture that the Chargers have cultivated in recent years. On Sunday, facing an ominous 0-3 start to the year, he led the Bolts to the tune of 40/47 for 405 yards and 3 TDs – a dazzling performance for fantasy purposes, but I gotta see a little more. I’d like to see the win secured with the ball in his hands. A 4th quarter comeback would be nice, as opposed to hanging on for dear life and praying they get a favorable bounce after a boneheaded 4th down call by Brandon Staley. If he’s gonna be labeled an absolute killer with ice in his veins, I’ve gotta see him be the reason they win, not an interception in the redzone from Kirk Cousins.
Okay okay, let’s settle down. In Herbert’s defense, he’s down another man with Mike Williams out for the year. Austin Ekeler is a catalyst in that offense and he’s been without him for two weeks now. It certainly isn’t ideal, but this is where legends are born, so step up or else I will continue to besmirch you on my blog.
Also, Brandon Staley seemingly did everything in his power to lose, going for a 4th down conversion as opposed to flipping the field with a punt and a dwindling clock working in his favor. It was braindead but he might just be our big dumb braindead boy, bailed out by a QB1 week 3 from his quarterback. His seat remains hot after a failed self-sabotage.
The big winners on the day were fantasy owners that started any of the top-3 receivers in the Chargers offense. Keenan Allen had 18 (!!!) catches for 215 yards, which is cool. Even cooler is the 49 yard TD pass that he threw. MASSIVE day for Keenan Allen. Mike Williams had 7 catches for 121 yards and a TD, but got carted off the field with a serious leg injury. Tough news after a big game and more work for the remaining healthy Chargers WRs should be incoming. Speaking of other Chargers WRs set to see an increase in targets, Joshua Palmer caught 4 for 66 and a TD. His role will increase, as will Quentin Johnston’s who should finally cut his teeth as the next man up.
Kirk Cousins battled his tits off but there was some horrifying clock management down the stretch which led to a last-second INT to let the Chargers off the hook. Otherwise, Kirk was great again – QB4 for the week and 32/50 for 367, 3 TDs, and only the late INT as a blemish. The lack of awareness and wasting roughly 20 seconds at the very end of the game was an unfortunate twist that now has people speculating that Kirk may be on the move out of Minnesota. One team that’s flying around – pun intended – is the Jets, which would solve their current QB conundrum (more on that later).
Alexander Mattison finally strengthened his grip on lead back duties with 20 carries for 93 yards and 5 catches for 32 yards. A solid game with 125 all-purpose yards was just what the doctor ordered to appease fantasy owners and ensure that his lead back status remains safe for at least one more week, but keep an eye on this one. Ty Chandler did look solid (3 carries for 27 yards), but this game was tighter than a g-string so they went with the trusted veteran in crunch time.
Justin Jefferson – 7 catches for 149 yards and a long-overdue first TD of the year. It was just a matter of time. I can’t say anything you don’t already know about him so I won’t try. Enjoy the expert graphic above and we’ll continue tracking his record-breaking season.
It was a group effort and everyone contributed but to no avail – TJ Hockenson is still hovering atop the season’s fantasy TE rankings with 8 catches for 78 yards but a fumble. He’s not going anywhere and he’s averaging >9 targets a game.
This game was a shootout and he didn’t score a TD, but Jordan Addison flashed some volume with 6 catches for 52 yards. His immediate contribution as a rookie behind Jefferson has been a nice bonus in this offense. Not to be outdone, KJ Osborn‘s only catch of the day was a 36-yard sideline tightrope TD. He may not be overly consistent, but he’s scored twice this year already.
It was a meltdown for the ages in Green Bay as the Saints somehow lose to the Packers after being up by 17 points in the 4th quarter.
Packers 18, Saints 17.
I understand Derek Carr left the game with a shoulder injury, and I don’t mean to kick a guy while he’s down, but he’s been pretty awful. He was never a standout fantasy player, but I don’t think I’ll ever voluntarily watch him take another snap. 13 for 18 for 103 yards and a touchdown pass to Jimmy friggin’ Graham. Because of course. Not Chris Olave, not Rashid Shaheed or even Michael Thomas. Derek Carr, in the rare instance that he actually does throw a TD, throws it to Jimmy Graham, helping no one. It’s simple fantasy etiquette to get it to his stud daddies, and Olave is scoreless on the young season so far. Has Derek Carr no morals?
Chris Olave finished with good numbers again, 8 catches for 104 yards, but no touchdown. Frustrating, I know, but he’s too good for those not to come with his elite numbers so far, so be patient. Michael Thomas was fine, 6 for 50. You’re certainly not starting him for that kind of production, but it’s encouraging to see Thomas make it through three games unscathed and semi-active in the passing attack. Running back has been a bit of a mess for the Saints but Alvin Kamara returns next week. He should have fresh legs and that’ll be an immediate injection of funky freshness into a mediocre Saints offense.
Kamara owners and Saints fans:
Meanwhile, Jordan Love was in the midst of a clunker and somehow still mounted the second biggest comeback in Packers franchise history, scoring 18 points in the 4th quarter to cap it off at home. Love was 22/44 for 259 yards, 1 TD, and an INT in what was shaping up to be a down offensive game. Additionally, he ran 9 times for 39 yards and another TD, which led the Packers in rushing. That 4th quarter TD run, 2 point conversion, and game-winning TD pass was enough to shock the Saints and get the win, 18-17.
It was mostly the Jordan Love show, but AJ Dillon carried 11 times for 33 yards. Aaron Jones can’t come back soon enough, their run game has been dead without him. Romeo Doubs had 5 catches for 73 yards including the second, game-winning circus TD snag with just under 3 minutes left in this game. Other notables: Jayden Reed, 3 for 63. Luke Musgrave, 6 for 49.
The Texans held the Jaguars scoreless in the first half at home to come into Jacksonville and get CJ Stroud/DeMeco Ryans a well-deserved victory.
I’m not sure what’s been eating the Jags these last two weeks, but giving up 37 points at home is an issue that needs resolving.
Texans 37, Jaguars 17.
CJ Stroud looked great again for the Texans, going 20/30 for 280 yards and 2 TDs. He’s quickly settled in and it’s gotta be nice to get that first win under his belt, especially on the road. He was QB11 this week and has yet to throw an INT this season, which is an encouraging sign for the rookie. The Texans may just have something here…
There hasn’t been much good to report about Dameon Pierce so far this season, even though he scored a touchdown on Sunday. He carried 14 times for just 31 yards, and he’s sitting at a disgusting 2.5 yards per carry on the season. His counterpart, Devin Singletary, carried 9 times for 41 yards and may have just played himself into more snaps. Dameon Pierce has struggled and Singletary has only ever been a backup in Buffalo, but for anyone that drafted Pierce in the middle rounds, it may be worth watching.
Fellow rookie Tank Dell has officially become a thing. See if he’s still around on waivers, but I doubt it. He caught 5 passes for 145 yards and a TD, leading all receivers by more than 110 yards. Next best was Robert Woods, 3 for 34. Even Nico Collins lagged behind with 2 catches on 3 targets for 34 yards. It’s good to see for Dell, and as promising as Stroud has looked, Collins should be firmly in weekly WR20-25 territory moving forward despite a slow day.
The Jags were simply unable to put the ball in the endzone on Sunday. Held scoreless in the first half, this game was 17-10 after a field goal in the 3rd quarter and the Jags appeared to be squarely back in it. The ensuing kickoff was returned by the Texans, the floodgates opened, and it was never less than a 10 point game thereafter.
Trevor Lawrence was 27/40 for 279 yards, 1 TD, and an INT. His lone passing TD went to Christian Kirk, who caught 4 passes for 54 yards. Not bad, but also not good enough. Evan Engram had 7 catches for 67, and Calvin Ridley was quiet with 3 catches for 40 yards. It’s a second straight flop, he HAS to fix his drops, and they need Ridley to be more than what he’s been these last two weeks (5 catches for 72 yards in that span).
Travis Etienne had a nice fantasy day, rushing 19 times for 88 yards to go along with 4 catches for 50 yards. None of it matters if they don’t win, I guess, but fantasy owners have to be fairly throbby in their pantaloons over that stat line from Etienne. Tank Bigsby did vulture a TD in the redzone, but that was to be expected at times this year.
The Dolphins absolutely bufu the Broncos, 70-20.
I don’t even know what to say about this one. It was such a destruction I almost felt bad for the Broncos at one point. Then I remembered that Sean Payton tends to talk out of his ass at times so that feeling quickly dissipated. It started pretty innocently, 14-7 at the end of the first quarter. From there, the Dolphins stepped on throats and scored 8 total touchdowns in what could only be described as a legendary day of fantasy scoring.
We’ll get the Broncos out of the way first. Russell Wilson was okay, again. 23/38 for 306 yards, 1 TD, and an INT. That’s just enough for QB19, but he’s not necessarily the reason for the beatdown. Javonte Williams was a non-factor again, 11 carries for 42 yards. Courtland Sutton caught Russ’s only TD pass on 8 catches for 91 yards and Marvin Mims returned a kickoff 99 yards late for some garbage time fantasy points (check to see if he’s available).
Now, for the Dolphins. Tua Tagovailoa went 23/26 for 309 yards and 4 TDs. Damn near a flawless game and Mike McDaniel was dialing it up perfectly.
Raheem Mostert had a second consecutive monster game, rushing 13 times for 82 yards and 3 TDs. That would’ve been enough, but he caught 7 passes for 60 yards and a receiving TD, bringing his daily total to 4. That’s a 38.2 point fantasy day for Mostert.
It doesn’t stop there, it gets better! De’Von Achane, the rookie backup, carried 18 times for 203 yards and 2 TDs to go with 4 catches for 30 yards and 2 more touchdowns! 47.3 fantasy points, simply unheard of.
4 TDs for Achane, 4 TDs for Mostert. The Dolphins running back room is going to enjoy reviewing this film.
Oh yeah, and Tyreek Hill had his usual 9 catches for 157 yards and a TD. It’s nuts that his stats are that boring in comparison to Mostert and Achane. The artist formerly known as Robby Anderson, who goes by “Chosen Anderson” now (objectively hilarious), also caught a bomb for 68 yards and a TD.
It was an absolute rout. The Dolphins are a lot of fun, Mike McDaniel is doing all the right things to have them in the conversation as favorites atop the AFC. I laughed out loud a few times for no particular reason while watching this game and it was delightful.
The Titans got properly jerked around by Deshaun Watson and the Browns on Sunday.
Browns 27, Titans 3.
This was the pathetic offensive game that Titans fans were waiting to see but hoped would never come. It was disastrous. For fantasy purposes, there’s really nothing to even talk about. Ryan Tannehill was 13/25 for 104 yards and 0 TDs. Derrick Henry ran it 11 times for 20 yards. Tyjae Spears ran 4 times for 6 yards. DeAndre Hopkins caught 3 passes for 48 yards, leading all Titans receivers. Chris Moore had 2 catches for 41. Chigoziem Okonkwo had 3 catches for 7 yards. It was an all-around stinkfest. Nothing else to say except YUCK TO THE 10th DEGREE.
The Browns, however, had a little fun out there and Deshaun Watson bounced back. He was 27/33 for 289 yards and 2 TDs to go with 4 carries for 16 yards. The loss of Nick Chubb didn’t slow them down very much, and waiver wire favorite from this past week Jerome Ford wasn’t great on the ground, carrying 10 times for just 18 yards but he scored a TD run, his second of the day after catching 2 passes for 33 yards and a TD. All things considered, not a bad return if you picked him up this week and it’s nice to know he can be relied on as a pass-catcher. The ground game wasn’t overly fruitful, but Pierre Strong Jr. was a participant with 6 carries for 27 yards. Kareem Hunt was dressed, but only tallied 35 scrimmage yards and shouldn’t pose much of a threat (for now).
Leading the way through the air for the Browns was Amari Cooper, who caught 7 passes for 116 yards and a TD. It should’ve been 2 TDs had it not been for an officiating snafu, but oh well. Sometimes NFL referees just lose their marbles and miss stuff that’s right in front of them.
This play ended in Browns WR Amari Cooper getting to the end zone for a touchdown… except the referee said Cooper stepped out of bounds.
— Arye Pulli (@AryePulli) September 24, 2023
Elijah Moore chipped in with 9 catches for 49 yards, Donovan Peoples-Jones had 3 for 49, and David Njoku had just 4 for 20.
The Commanders honeymoon is over as they were all but blanked by the Bills on Sunday.
Bills 37, Commanders 3.
Everything was going pretty smoothly for the Commanders under new ownership. Ron Rivera’s transition lenses had never been darker and things were looking better. They even started out 2-0, who woulda thought?!
The Bills put a stop to that on Sunday and brought Sam Howell back down to earth. He was, in a word, shit. 19/29 for 170 yards, no TDs, and 4 INTs. He threw an interception in every quarter which is the way you gotta do it if you’re gonna throw 4 in a game. Really quite epic if you step back and take a look at the bigger picture. It really wasn’t out of hand until well into the second half, but the young Commanders QB just couldn’t get out of his own way, and this can be viewed as a is a learning experience. It was also a bit of a “welcome back to Hell” moment for fans with oozing Dan Snyder-induced gangrenous wounds that are still in the healing process.
Besides the whole “not scoring any touchdowns” thing, there’s some reason for cautious optimism if you’re a Commie. For starters, Brian Robinson had another strong showing, rushing 10 times for 70 yards. He’s looked like a certified beef lord and the Commanders have themselves an RB1. In less exciting RB room news, Antonio Gibson had 5 total touches and a fumble, an issue that’s persisted plagued him throughout his entire career. He still hasn’t really settled in at a given position (WR in college, RB in pros?) and I fear that his ball-security troubles will only limit his reps further.
As I suspected last week, Jahan Dotson is third in line for targets and has severely disappointed so far. His lack of ANYTHING after teasing last season with his touchdown-scoring ability has been deflating. Last week’s advice rings true: BENCH JAHAN DOTSON until further notice.
Curtis Samuel had 2 catches for 54 yards, leading Washington’s receivers, and Terry McLaurin had 6 catches for 41 yards. Not much was going right in the way of passing and catching and Commanders receivers may prove to be a fickle crew throughout the season.
The Bills continue to improve a bit each week and Josh Allen can say the same thing. Since the week 1 four turnover loss to the Jets, he’s limited mistakes and only thrown 1 pick since. On Sunday he was 20/32 for 218 yards, 1 TD, and an INT. He ran 3 times for 46 yards and another TD, providing the sneaky running value that all fantasy owners know, love, and have come to expect.
Another week goes by, another sexual performance by James Cook as a runner. 15 carries for 98 yards, shifty, dodging contact, avoiding tackles, yards after contact, the whole kit was on display. HOWEVA, another week goes by with no touchdown. What happened? Latavius Murray happened, again.
James Cook 2023 17-game pace:
306 touches
1,893 total yards
0 touchdowns— Ian Hartitz (@Ihartitz) September 25, 2023
As I touched on last week, Latavius Murray is a “notorious TD vulture”. On Sunday, he did exactly that – he ran 5 times for 15 yards and a rushing TD. 
The rest of the scoring was accomplished by way of Josh Allen’s arm, several field goals, and a pick-six. Stefon Diggs was busy, catching 8 for 111 yards. Gabe Davis caught his only pass of the day for a 35 yard TD. Besides those two, there wasn’t much to call home about from a fantasy standpoint. Easy win for the Bills and the Commanders may want to reset and prepare themselves for the Eagles next week.
The Colts somehow pull it off in overtime against the Ravens, with a little help from their friends.
Colts 22, Ravens 19.
It’s been a long time coming and plenty of jokes have been made, but Dan Orlovsky is finally off the hook. Gardner Minshew, in relief work while Anthony Richardson’s concussion subsides, won the ballgame. We can start off with that. He also threw in “an Orlovsky” for good measure. This is when you accidentally step out of the back of your own endzone for a safety during a pass drop back. It’s embarrassing and now there’s a new doofus to wear the badge, so congrats to Dan Orlovsky on that. Gardner with the zero awareness play, but he was sufficient otherwise and they won so it’s all good. Minshew was 27/44 for 227 yards and a TD.
Filling in for Jonathan Taylor while he sorts some things out, Zack Moss again looked… good? If you picked him up and started him this week, you were handsomely rewarded with 30 carries and 122 yards. If he’s still available (unlikely, unless you’re in a league with fewer teams) then acquire him. The Colts leaned heavy on the run and it was working nicely on Sunday.
Another reliable start, Michael Pittman Jr. caught 9 passes for 77 yards. He’s getting ample targets, even with Richardson out, and it’s all about volume with Pittman. He’ll ideally find the endzone more, but his target share and WR13 status is a safe weekly option, no matter the quarterback situation. Rookie Josh Downs also caught 8 passes for 57 yards and has seemingly usurped Alec Pierce (3 for 43) as the defacto WR2 in that offense.
The Ravens offense was a bit stagnant on Sunday and their only two touchdowns came in the form of Lamar Jackson runs. He wasn’t superb through the air, completing 22/31 passes for 202 yards and 0 TDs, but he made up for it with 14 carries, 101 yards and 2 TDs. He was responsible for all of their offense on Sunday and the Colts stole one in OT. It was a slow-ish game for the Ravens passing game, Zay Flowers caught 8 passes for 48 yards and Mark Andrews caught 4 for 35. Rashod Bateman (1 for 6) is nonexistent and droppable if you were still holding out hope. Nelson Agholor caught 4 more passes for 39 yards, still not a viable option.
The lack of red zone carries and scoring opportunities was unfortunate for Gus Edwards owners. I extended invitations to board the “Gus Bus” this past week and he couldn’t deliver. He carried 11 times for 51 yards and left the game early with concussion concerns. Talk about a missed opportunity – Justice Hill wasn’t able to go on account of a bad toe and his only competition for touches was Melvin Gordon, but Edwards left early and couldn’t capitalize around the red zone (where Lamar Jackson handled most of the work). This is suddenly a disaster, as if it wasn’t before, and Melvin Gordon might be worth a look but only if you’re heavily invested/hurting from the Ravens backfield. Gus Edwards and Justice Hill are both banged up, so I can’t in good faith recommend either of those guys moving forward. The most likely scenario is Lamar running more, so invest wisely (if at all).
Remember when I mentioned NFL referees losing their marbles and missing stuff that’s right in front of them? The Ravens got jobbed in overtime by a horrid missed PI non-call. I’m not sure they deserved to win anyway, but it was bad. The missed call certainly doesn’t negate the rest of their shitty game, but it ultimately put the final damper on any chance they had at getting a cheap win (or tie).
The Patriots win the pillow fight to beat the Jets and get a convincing first win of the year.
When he wasn’t sack-tapping Sauce Gardner, Mac Jones was game-managing his way to a win over the lowly Jets. Great work. He was 15/29 for 201 yards and a TD pass. It was was closer than it should’ve been and he was painfully average.
Cue the Randy Newman song. Strange things are happening, my world is turned upside down, because Ezekiel Elliott got 17 touches on Sunday.
This was wholly unexpected, Zeke hasn’t played a significant role in any Patriots game so far, but Belichick may be up to his old tricks again. Around here we refer to them as “Belitricks”. Perhaps it took him a few weeks to learn the offense, but Zeke carried 16 times for 80 yards and Rhamondre Stevenson carried 19 times for 59 yards. Seeing 5.0 yards per carry next to Zeke’s name is a shock to the system and I don’t think there’s any real concern here with Rhamondre, but Zeke came outta nowhere. Stevenson still got to 20 total touches, the Patriots were probably just riding the hot hand and killing the clock. Everything’s fine, right guys?…….. right?
Pharaoh Brown had 2 catches for 71 yards and a TD (no one is starting him in fantasy), Kendrick Bourne had 4 for 46, and thaaaaat’s about it. The Patriots receivers aren’t very good so it’s unsurprising to see their air attack sputter.
Thankfully for the Pats, the Jets are the crusted skidmarks on the thong of the NFL. Maybe they trade for Kirk Cousins, or maybe they continue to flounder and flop around like a fish out of water. The QB play from Zach Wilson is absolutely murdering any chance they have with an otherwise young and talented crop of players. You can point to the offensive line or whatever you want, but he’s not an NFL quarterback, sorry.
Let me start by saying one thing about Zach Wilson. The headband seems a little fucked up. You can’t wear a headband like that if you stink, you’re just not allowed to do it. Take it off and rebrand. You look like a dipshit on the sideline wearing that thing after you throw a 2 yard pass on 4th and 10. 18/36 for 157 yards. Not a serious quarterback, beyond brutal, and it’s time for the Jets to find a better option. Call Kirk Cousins.
The unfortunate, accompanying reality with Wilson’s incompetence is the talent that’s being wasted. The defensive line is arguably the best in the league. There’s plenty of young talent on that team that’s overlooked and underused, and it’s just a damn shame. Patient Zero here is Garrett Wilson. He had 5 catches for 48 yards and there was visible frustration on the sideline between Garrett and Zach Wilson. I’ll repeat what I said last week for all those in the back, avoid starting Jets skill players until Zach Wilson is outta there. That still includes Breece Hall (12 carries, 18 yards) and Dalvin Cook (8 carries, 18 yards). Maybe Joe Flacco could come back, that’d be a better option than Zach Wilson at this point because he’s bringing everyone around him down into the sewer. There are literally no playable fantasy options for the Jets at this time. I repeat, STAY AWAY.
The Seahawks survive against the Red Rifle to top the Panthers.
Seahawks 37, Panthers 27.
With Bryce Young out this week recovering from an ankle injury, Andy Dalton took the reins for the Panthers to give it a go against the Seahawks in Seattle. He was pretty damn good all-in-all, going 34/58 for 361 yards and 2 TDs. If you threw him in there as a spot starter this week, he gave you QB7 quality play. This is nice and all, but the Bryce Young reps are more important than immediate wins for the Panthers so it was a one-off situation. Thank you for your service, Andy, back to the bench you go. Or may I interest you in a starting job for the Jets? They need an actual NFL quarterback.
Playing from behind and throwing it 58 times left only a few looks for Miles Sanders, but he carried 9 times for 24 yards and got a touchdown. He was an active participant in the passing game as well, catching 5 balls for 38 yards. Overall a solid day considering they were so pass-happy.
I said last week that Adam Thielen was Bryce Young’s favorite target and security blanket. That same logic was applied even with Bryce Young out, as Andy Dalton found him 11 times for 145 yards and a TD. He’s proving his worth outside of Minnesota and he’s all the way up to WR9 on the year, even after being absent in week 1. Age is just a number and we don’t subscribe to ageism on this blog. He can still go get it! DJ Chark also caught a touchdown on 4 passes for 86 yards.
Aside from five Seattle field goals, this was more or less the Kenneth Walker III show. He did it all, carrying 18 times for 97 yards and 2 TDs. Easily the best, most efficient fantasy performance of his young season thus far, including 3 catches for 59 yards. The two Dolphins running backs were RB1 and RB2, obviously, but Kenneth Walker was RB3 with 27.6 fantasy points. Zach Charbonnet was there again with 9 carries for 46 yards and looked fine in limited action, but Kenneth Walker is doing everything he needs to preserve bell-cow status. I still say pick up Charbonnet as he sneaks up around 50% snap rate, as a safety measure.
Geno Smith was solid on Sunday, 23/36 for 296 yards, 1 TD and an INT. He targeted DK Metcalf the most, 6 times for 112 yards. Tyler Lockett had another oddly horrible game with just 3 catches for 34 yards, but somewhat salvaged it with a late two-point conversion to ease the pain a bit. He’s been quiet in 2 of the first 3 weeks, but I’m not sweating him yet.
The Chiefs survive a HARD FOUGHT WIN against the idiot Bears.
Chiefs 41, Bears 10.
We addressed Taylor Swift already and I refuse to give it any more attention than it’s already gotten. I know, I am so brave.
The Chiefs coasted on Sunday against the Bears and the wheels are officially off in Chicago. Justin Fields stinks and if this was him breaking loose from the robotic restrictions of his coaches, then it might be time to go back to the drawing board. Throw a stick of dynamite into this offense, blow it up, and start over. Yes, Fields is a talented runner (11 carries for 47 yards) but that’s not enough. He was just 11/22 for 99 yards, 1 TD and another INT. The way he’s playing, he can’t afford even a single hiccup. I know it’s the Chiefs and they’re in the upper echelon of the league, but come on.
Similar to the Jets, bench your Bears skill players for the foreseeable future. I will allow a DJ Moore start, but even that’s risky given the plight with Fields. If/when they figure something out, you can start them again, but they have to earn your trust.
Khalil Herbert carried 7 times for 31 yards and caught 2 passes for 4 yards. BENCH HIM. Roschon Johnson carried 8 times for 38 yards + 2 catches for 11 yards. STASH HIM if you want.
The lone bright spot on the day was a garbage-time TD pass to DJ Moore with 4:20 left in the game. Moore finished with 3 for 41 and the TD.
The Chiefs continued onward and enjoyed a 34-0 lead at the half, putting it into cruise control for the entire second half.
Patrick Mahomes was himself. 24/33, 272 yards, 3 TDs, 0 INTs. He basically played 3 quarters in this game and logged a QB5 performance for the week. Are we watching the greatest NFL quarterback ever?
The backfield still seems to belong to Isaiah Pacheco, but this week the entire running back room got some love. Pacheco carried 15 times for 62 yards and a TD. Clyde Edwards-Helaire also carried 15 times for 55 yards and a TD. Jerick McKinnon carried just twice for 9 yards, but caught 3 passes for 19 yards and 2 TDs.
Former Tennessee Volunteer, Vol for life, and physicist Josh Dobbs has done it. He was close in weeks 1 and 2, all the signs were pointing toward a breakthrough and it happened on Sunday. Dobbs was 17/21 for 189 yards and a TD. He also scampered 6 times for 55 yards. There’s not a better backup QB in the league than Joshua Dobbs and the Cowboys felt that deep burn on Sunday. Perhaps Dobbs would be interested in a starting job with the New York Jets?
Not that it’s a surprise to anyone, but James Conner comes in again with a RB6 performance, 14 carries for 98 yards and a TD. He’s made it easy on Joshua Dobbs to adjust into the starting role and he’s RB8 on the season so far. He’s scored a TD in each of his last two games and is averaging roughly 100 yards/game in that span. Bully ball. I must say I liked what Jonathan Gannon did with Rondale Moore in this game, having him rush 3 times for 54 yards and a TD. He’s got talent, and getting him involved in more ways than just as a receiver is a smart move to add another layer to an offense that’s suddenly clicking.
Rookie Michael Wilson caught 2 passes for 86 yards, leading the Cardinals receiving corps. Marquise Brown caught 5 passes for 61 yards and a 4th quarter TD pass to lock the door on the Cowboys and secure the win.
The Cowboys were left without answers. Dak Prescott threw his first INT of the year, and it was a costly one. It came with 3:00 left in the game, he tried to force it into quintuple coverage and it was easily picked off. Had they had found a way to score there, they still had all three timeouts plus the two-minute warning timeout. If there was any chance at a comeback, it was dashed right then and there. He still managed a 25/40, 249 yard 1 TD game otherwise but the pick wasn’t great.
The Cardinals defense held the Cowboys at bay, but Tony Pollard had another nice, high-volume day. 23 carries for 122 yards. Rico Dowdle is slowly getting more and more involved with 4 carries for 21 yards along with 3 catches for 25 yards and a TD. CeeDee Lamb only got to 4 catches for 53 yards, and Michael Gallup had 6 catches for 92 yards. It was 21-10 at the half and the Cowboys scored 6 unanswered to start the second half, but the Marquise Brown TD from Dobbs followed by the Dak INT was too much to overcome.
The Steelers go to Vegas and leave victorious over the Raiders.
Steelers 23, Raiders 18.
Don’t look now, but Mike Tomlin has the Steelers at 2-1 despite a general lack of offensive firepower and some concerns at quarterback. I’ll say Kenny Pickett looked better this week, but it still wasn’t anything that’s flying off the page to me. 16/28 for 235 yards and 2 TDs. It was a clean game, he only took one sack, committed no turnovers, and that’s all they really needed out of him.
The Steelers continue to feed Najee Harris, 19 carries for 65 yards. My eyes feel like they’re gonna bleed and melt out of my head when I watch Najee try to find room to run, but Jaylen Warren wasn’t much better on Sunday night with 8 carries for 29 yards. At least Warren provides some receiving ability, catching 3 passes for 23 yards, but it still seems like Tomlin is dead-set on Harris leading the backfield and they’re currently finding ways to win.
George Pickens had 4 catches for 75 yards, Calvin Austin III had 2 catches for 72 yards and a long TD, and Pat Freiermuth had 3 catches for 41 yards and a TD. Fantasy owners would love to see Pickens show that big-play ability and get in the endzone, but that depends on if Pickett can grow as a pocket passer. Hopefully Pickett continues to gain confidence and we see more of that as the season plays out.
Losing the turnover battle ended up killing the Raiders and Jimmy Garoppolo was 28/44 for 324 yards, 2 TDs, with 3 INTs. TJ Watt was physically assaulting him all game which sent Jimmy G into concussion protocol after the game, according to Josh McDaniels, so maybe that played a part.
Both Garoppolo touchdown passes went to Davante Adams who caught 13 passes for 172 yards. If nothing else, at least Davante is putting up numbers for his fantasy owners.
Another highly touted fantasy asset, Josh Jacobs, has been abysmal to start this year and is NOT putting up fantasy numbers. He carried 17 times for 62 yards, just 3.6 yards per carry. On the bright side, this was his season-high in rushing yards and there’s mathematically nowhere to go but up after last week’s 9 carry, -2 yard game. He’s playing roughly 80% of his team’s offensive snaps, but he’s started dreadfully slow, betraying those that thought he would recreate last year’s magic. He sits at RB32 after another stinker.
Other notables: Jakobi Meyers, 7 catches for 85 yards. Hunter Renfrow, 2 catches for 17 yards.
Why aren’t they using Renfrow at all? Coming off a WR14 season in 2021, he’s essentially been phased out of the offense altogether. He’s only gotten 3 total targets this season and is playing in just ~50% of snaps. I know Davante needs his targets, but only 3 for Renfrow?
The Buccaneers falter at home against the Eagles on Monday night.
Eagles 25, Buccaneers 11.
It felt like this one would be closer, but the Eagles defensive line made sure it wasn’t.
Before we get into the fantasy performers, can we address Jordan Davis? Not to mention the rest of the young defensive core, but the big fella is playing at an insanely high level already. The entire NFL getting too proud to draft Davis only for him to fall to the Eagles at 10th overall is coming back to haunt them because he’s looking unblockable. Advice: It might be best to run where he isn’t. Here he is handling two blockers with ease, rag-dolling them to stuff the run and cause a safety:
Eagles tackle White in the end zone for the safety!
: #PHIvsTB on ABC
: Stream on #NFLPlus https://t.co/NkpBC1YFYJ pic.twitter.com/6COBCcZbdk
— NFL (@NFL) September 26, 2023
Jalen Hurts was reportedly having flu-like symptoms before Monday night’s game, but he still put together 23/37 for 277 yards, 1 TD, and 2 INTs. The interceptions were out of character, but he added another rushing TD (his 3rd of the year) on 10 carries for 28 yards. I’m split on their “QB sneak” formation and part of me thinks it should be illegal, but I can’t really say why. Any time they need a yard or two, it’s actually unstoppable.
The discussion on the sideline last week must’ve worked, because AJ Brown led the team with 9 catches and 131 yards. The only Hurts passing TD was on a long throw over the middle to Olamide Zaccheaus, which helps nobody in fantasy, but it was a nice play regardless. Dallas Goedert added 5 for 41 and DeVonta Smith was quiet with 4 for 28.
The Eagles backfield is, as I predicted, a true split. No, D’Andre Swift didn’t get 28 carries again like he did in week 2, but he was still the clear superior runner on Monday night. Swift carried 16 times for 130 yards and broke off several big chunk runs. I’m not sure how much separation he afforded himself, but he looked great again. Kenneth Gainwell received 14 carries but was only able to get loose for 43 yards. It’s still a timeshare, but the scales tipped in favor of Swift last night, no doubt. It’d be in Swift and Gainwell’s best interest to score from outside the red zone because Nick Sirianni leaves short yardage/goal line opportunities for Jalen Hurts exclusively and touchdown points may be a little hard to come by.
The Bengals ride the Ja’Marr Chase pony en route to victory over the Rams.
He might’ve hobbled around like a doofus for most of the night, but Joe Burrow was just healthy enough to lead the Bengals to a win. He was 26/49 for 259 yards and an INT. No touchdowns, but he spread it around to his guys and let them do the fast-twitch things while he stayed flat-footed in the pocket as much as possible. Again, as I said last week, Joe Burrow is NOT right, and they were lucky to get out of this one with a win. Is it really worth him playing through this injury and risking re-aggravating his calf/ankle? From a fantasy viewpoint, he’s QB30 and not worth a start unless he magically heals up before next week.
Burrow was, however, able to move the ball thanks to his main man Ja’Marr Chase. Chase was automatic last night, reeling in 12 of 15 targets for 141 yards including several key catches down the stretch to lock up a win. Tee Higgins struggled to 2 catches on 8 targets for just 21 yards before getting dinged up and retreating to the locker room later in the game. Tyler Boyd had 5 catches for 39 yards as well.
It was a sluggish game comprised only of field goals up until a Joe Mixon touchdown run with 5:34 to go in the 3rd quarter which turned out to be the deciding factor in this one. He rushed 19 times for 65 yards and the TD. It’s not exactly the efficiency we’d like to see from Mixon, but breaking through and scoring a touchdown helps. Hopefully Burrow can get to 100% at some point and we’ll see the Bengals offense that we’re used to.
The Rams offense finally slowed down a bit and Matthew Stafford had a few unlucky bounces that resulted in turnovers. He was 18/33 for 269 yards, 1 TD, and 2 INTs. There was a touchdown incorrectly taken off the board from Tutu Atwell that shifted momentum, but that’s how things go sometimes.
Again, the slow game theme carried over to the Rams’ running game and Kyren Williams was held in check. 10 carries for 38 yards. Tutu Atwell was also used once on a jet-sweep that went for 22 yards on the ground.
Puka Nacua stayed steady with 5 catches for 72 yards despite an oblique injury. Tyler Higbee was solid with 5 catches for 71 yards and Tutu Atwell had 4 catches for 50 yards and a TD (should’ve been 2).
Did Tutu Atwell step out of bounds?
pic.twitter.com/AFkpSYaIGi
— OddsChecker (@OddsCheckerUS) September 26, 2023
Check back next Tuesday and follow me on X at @Clax_TN. Until then, win the waiver wire and best of luck!